Monday, May 4, 2009

Love be patient, Love be Kind

Most women I associate myself with pride themselves on being sexy, savvy, and independent. They make their own money, pay their own bills, and consider themselves equally matched to men in practically every way. So I know i'll probably get some shaking heads with what I'm about to write. My Love has decided that he needs a "Break", and I am voluntarily choosing to wait.
I can hear the "Oh, Hell Naw" coming but I have my reasons. Mainly being because I don't want to inflict my broken heart on the possible decent men out there. I could choose to fill my Blackberry with meaningless dates and engagements, but it honestly isn't fair to subject some poor soul into being my "place-filler". I've done it many times before, it ain't pretty. I am guilty of going out with a perfectly un-traumatized gentleman allowed him to court me, kiss me, and fall in love with me; all the while I was pining away for someone else. End result? He's gonna get pissed, and now he's messed up and skeptical of the next woman. My sincere bad, my sister.
Why am I choosing to wait you ask; plain out I just love him. I honestly feel that he just spooked himself, and will come around. And if for some reason that isn't the case, then I have faith the GOD will release this hold on my heart. In the meantime, it doesn't behoove me to waste valuable time out in the club being grinded upon or at a sushi bar making bad smalltalk.
It's downright exhausting and unfulfilling to me.